What a Crashing Bore!  (England v Italy 10th March 2013)

“I spy with my little eye something beginning with the letter P”. Could it be “pace”, “pass”, or “poise”, and not surprisingly worth twenty points in your Rugby Union Home Nations ‘I Spy Book’?

No, the answer is “Penalty Goals” and not surprisingly worth just two points. What about something beginning with ‘S’?  Surely “sidestep” or “swerve” and worth fifteen points?  Sorry, such words don’t appear to be in the book, only “size” and “slog” and worth only one point.

I kid you not, if such an I Spy Book was available today for youngsters looking to log the individual attacking skills, flair, and artistry of exciting runners like Jeremy Guscott, Will Greenwood, John Horton, Bev Risman, Richard Sharp, Barry John, Allan Bateman, Jonathan Davies, Tom Brophy, Phil Bennett, Malcolm Phillips and more, they would collect few points at the end of eighty minutes of sterile play in most international matches at Twickenham, Murrayfield, Landsdowne Road, The Millennium Stadium and elsewhere.

What would those young I Spy spotters log in their books? Endless scrums, and half backs kicking the ball as high or as long as they could, or ‘pick up and go’ with giant over muscled forwards charging at each other from one metre apart! and senseless, seventeen stones centres bludgeoning and battering each other in midfield. Oh yes, and those penalty goals, with a staggering 23 successful kicks recorded in comparison to 4 tries in just one weekend of three matches.

Don’t blame the muscled and bulked up players who, being full time professionals, are expected to be fitter, faster, and stronger than previous generations; for they are designed and asked to play according to the demands and especially the limitations of the laws of the game.

And herein lies the problem on the field and off it for the countless thousands who enjoy and relish a presence at some of the most exhilarating of social sporting events, but who trek home often thoroughly disappointed at the fare on view throughout the eighty minutes of action.

And the fare on view at most venues?   Let Gerald Davies, one of Wales finest ever wingers, have the final say……  “the tournament has been heavily biased towards tight defences and monotonous power play, the matches frequently bearing the imprint of repeated wrestling confrontations. Rarely have we witnessed smooth and extended periods of cleverness and purple patches inspired by players of delicate talent.  It has been unremittingly gladiatorial, pitilessly severe and oppressive. The game needs to break out of these grim shackles.”

And those “grim shackles”? The laws of the game which restrict the flair and freedom of movement from a clever footballer of whatever size!

Ray French (12 March 2013)